I was overweight for most of my life from the age of 10. This baby never lost her baby fat. At the age of 47, I began my weight loss journey, in earnest, due to some health problems. I have lost over 100 pounds and kept it off for over five years.
For me, the process of losing weight has become a journey of body, mind and soul. Think of some trips you have taken in your life. Parts may have been difficult, parts were fun, and some parts were enlightening or educational. Some parts may have even been scary for you. Your own weight loss journey can be rocky, exhilarating and just plain hard work. But like most trips you've taken it is well worth it. This journey is one towards health and happiness. But like any journey, it is very personal and can be taken in many ways.
The following seven stepping-stones have helped me immensely on my personal journey, even today.
1. First and foremost, you must come to realize that this can not be just a temporary diet. In order to lose weight and keep it off you must make some permanent lifestyle changes. The journey must start in your head. You have to want it enough to do the work it will take. You have to really and truly believe that you can do it. Do you? What purpose is the weight serving for you? You need to do some soul searching and life inventory to see what is making you live the way you do now. However, don't wait until you get all the answers. Do something positive toward your goal while you search for answers to those deep questions.
OK, about this thing called motivation. What is it? Motivation is that burning desire inside you to accomplish something by doing whatever it takes to do so. It is a resolute, single-minded focus on doing something important to you. When I'm motivated, nothing can get in my way. When I'm not, anything can. Don't wait for motivation to appear miraculously. It may or may not come to you. But one thing I know, from experience, is that doing something, even something very small, that leads to success, breeds motivation. And that motivation cultivates success which in turn breeds continuing motivation.
There is nothing magic about losing weight. It's all about calories in and calories out. It's not rocket science. However, you have to let go of so much magical thinking that we develop over the years. "If I don't eat the whole candy bar, it won't count." "I am eating while I walk so I am burning these calories." "If I eat just handful more it won't matter," etc, etc, etc. Does this sound familiar? Many people tell me I am lucky to have lost my weight. Luck nothing to do with it. More magical thinking in action!.
This is a journey, not a race. Don't compare yourself to your 20-year-old co-worker who can drop pounds like water off a duck's back. Don't compare yourself to yourself. Don't berate yourself about all the times you tried before and didn't succeed, Take this new journey, willingly, joyfully, in your own way and in your own time and you will succeed.
You can't practice all the components of a healthy lifestyle only when it is convenient, when you are under no stress and when you have the time and energy to devote to it. You don't just pay your bills and go to work when you are happy and unstressed. You must also treat your health in that uncompromising way. Your life can't get in the way and you can't do this just when it is convenient, and easy. People who are healthy and balanced are able to cope with life stressors much better. Furthermore, you can't pick and choose components. You can't just eat well but not exercise. It won't work if you eat better but refuse to eat any vegetables. Your body is much like a machine and it needs all the right ingredients to make it work well. You don't decide to put only gas in your car and not brake fluid or oil. It all works together. Taking care of yourself, body, mind and soul has to be something that is done with balance. It all comes down to making a small series of good decisions about eating ,exercise and staying positive all day, every day, most of the time.
2. You must become your own parent or best friend. Talk to yourself like your own beloved child. The dialogue in your head should be loving, encouraging and respectful. Give yourself loving encouragement and rules. Make up affirmations and post them where you will see them all the time. I posted my goal weight everywhere in my house, especially where my trouble spots were, like the refrigerator. I told people it was a serial number for inventory purposes! When you have a negative thought, turn it around immediately. When I drop something and think to myself, "How stupid you are!" I turn it around and say, "No, you aren't stupid, just in too much of a hurry." Treat yourself with kindness and love always. Your self-esteem and self-love will grow as you do this. Your mind believes what you tell it. Developing your self-esteem takes time and practice. You must do things that make you feel loved, powerful, competent and strong.
Be realistic. You will falter and fall. We all do. You're not perfect, just human, like the rest of us. You may not be able to get as thin as you think you should. Be kind to yourself through this process. Give yourself non-food rewards such as a massage, a new haircut, a new CD or a smaller article of clothing. You must be your own cheerleader and your own motivator.
3. You have to be willing to get rid of excuses and be willing to work on change. No matter what life issues we have, we each have to approach this journey in a way that makes sense and feels like it will be successful for us. I did it whole hog. I just stopped eating 24/7. I began to change my eating and exercise habits, literally, over night. I have added things over time, like eating mostly, fresh fruits and vegetables, but for the most part, this total approach worked well for me. I also started to exercise every single day, no excuses, and no exceptions. Many people recommend "taking baby steps" in reference to making lifestyle changes. This can be the best approach for many. However, you must look at the term "baby steps." What does this really mean? Babies learn to walk with small, halting, steps while falling frequently but they keep on trying. They don't give up, ever. They progress steadily and soon they move from walking to running. And they never go back to baby steps again.
4. You must learn to eat differently. If you keep doing what you have been doing and it's not working, you have to make changes. It all comes down to habits. You break old habits by substituting new ones. You can get used to anything. I wouldn't eat cottage cheese or drink non-fat milk for many years. Then I began to add non-fat milk to my whole milk then to my 2% then my 1%. Whole milk, once my staple, tastes like heavy cream to me now! Try one new food a week or try new ways of cooking old foods. I still don't like liver but I will try a taste of it now and then just to see if it or I have changed! I grew up on vegetables boiled to death in vats of gray water. If we were lucky, the limp pile on my plate was topped with salt and butter. So I never really tasted vegetables in all their glory. Try to steam your veggies lightly, roast them or grill them. Try different spices on them. When you make salads you can make them interesting by adding a bit of cheese, nuts and croutons to them, but not too much! Homemade vegetable soups seem to appeal to most people and vegetables can be grated into meatloaf and pured into spaghetti sauce, as well.
When you want to eat, ask yourself "Is this stomach, mouth or heart hunger?" if it is true stomach hunger, I eat something healthy. If it is mouth hunger, I chew on some carrot or celery sticks or chewing gum. If it is heart hunger, I try to identify what I need, Sometimes I talk with a friend, sometimes, I take a walk or write. This is a good time to clean out a drawer or your desk. Sometimes when I realize that I am tired I take bubble bath and go to bed. You will learn to become responsible and mindful of your eating habits. What are your triggers for binges? Do you engage in mindless eating? When? Where? Why? Try to identify your triggers. One night I was working at my desk. I couldn't find my checkbook and I thought it might be in the daycare playroom. I went there and I found myself in the kitchen in front of the refrigerator with the door open. I knew my checkbook wasn't in there! I stopped myself then but wondered how many times I had mindlessly meandered to the refrigerator and didn't stop myself. I think binges are hard to control. When I have binged I try to stop myself before it gets too bad. I take my mind off my binging by quickly diverting my attention.
When I have a craving, sometimes, I tell myself, I can have what I want tomorrow. I make an elaborate plan in my head and by the next day I forget all about it. If I don't then I indulge in a limited portion of what I want. Another trick I've used comes from my child development background. It is accepted practice that when you have to say no to a child, you offer something positive in its place. Such as, "No you can't go outside now but when you finish your homework you can. Or, "No, you can't wear your swimsuit because it's raining but you can choose which coat you want to wear." When I want something now, I tell myself, "No you can't tilt back the refrigerator right now and inhale but you can have some fruit with yogurt and sprinkling of nuts on it." "No, you can't skip exercising but you can either do a workout tape or take a walk."
5. You have to move. Find something you like to do. Do something every day, no exceptions no excuses, no matter how little you can do at the beginning. You have to vary your workouts so that you don't get bored and your muscles will work less with each repetition. You need to challenge yourself more and more, little by little. I have as many excuses not to exercise as anyone. I still really don't enjoy it. But I do it, no questions asked. I pay my bills, I go to work, I exercise. Sometimes when I really don't want to start, I tell myself that I only have to do 10 minutes of my chosen activity, and then I can quit. The endorphins kick in and I always continue for at least half an hour, if not more. I don't give myself a choice now. I used to resist walking in my neighborhood because I felt there was no scenery to look at and the park was too far away. After making myself walk a few times, it was amazing how many pretty trees and gardens I had never noticed and the park suddenly was much closer than it had ever been!
6. Have fun on this journey. You have to make it enjoyable or you will give up. Make a scrapbook about this journey. Write about your success and failures. Take pictures of yourself regularly. Some people measure their waist with a string each week and keep the strings so they can see their progress. Give yourself silly rewards for each pound lost, a bottle of bubbles, a comic book, Make charts or calendars about eating and exercise. Give yourself stickers for each day you do well. Make a picture collage of things you want when you lose weight. Places you want to go, clothes you want. Watch funny movies; listen to music you love, read books you enjoy. Spend some time doing something you enjoy, every single day, even if it is just a few minutes. Take up a new hobby that will keep you busy. Write about funny things that happen on this journey. I have a couple of funny stories to share with you. My grandniece, who was about 4, at the time asked what my free weights were for. I told they were helping me to get big, strong muscles. I made a fist and showed her by bicep. She promptly pointed to the bat wings, under my arms and said, "I see your muscles right down there!" Another time, I told my sister that as I was losing weight there were dents all over my body where the fat was disappearing. I put my hands on my sides and said, "Like here. What is this?" Without missing a beat she said, she said, "That's your waist!" I had no ideas. I'd never had one!
7. Get support from those who understand and will help you to succeed. Keep it private unless people will be supportive. How many times have you tried? If they expect you to fail, once again, it may hinder your success. Join some kind of support group in person or online such as Weight Watchers or TOPS. You don't have to spend lots of money. Ask your family members, your co workers or neighbors if they want to join you on your journey.
Most importantly, believe in yourself and believe that you deserve this healthy, happy new life.
I have successfully maintained a weight loss of 110 pounds, for over 5 years. I am a successful writer, speaker and weight loss and wellness coach. I can help you because I've been where you are but, more importantly, I can help you find your way to health and happiness.
I have 100's of other tips on my web site http://www.thinlynn.com
Please contact me at thinlynn@thinlynn.com
